Idiosyncrasy

            When 4 different people has to live under the same roof, it is chaos. Lucky the other 3 the can mix up pretty well since they think and act the same way in pretty much everything. Too bad for the other person who has to live up with the other 3. Why do I have to be the one person who stands alone? Cause I chose to. There will be no details needed for this since I have no intention to spread out any negativity throughout the world. Thus, this is my prayer.            Dear ALLAH Al Mighty, replace them 3 and let me stay with peace for another 5 semesters in this lovely room that I'm so thankful for.  :)

            Hypothetically, I'm a loser. There. I said it out loud. Not exactly. I typed it out in bold. Talking about being sarcastic. It has been days, weeks now, that I've been supressing my feelings. Atleast trying to. Since it's really hard to keep quiet for so long about something that you can't actually hold on to.             When there is no one for you to hold, or actually anything for to rely on, I must say, there would be none than an inch think of strength in me now. Forcing myself to do something that I have no interest in. Or even trying to hold in the madness in me that I have towards the people around me, it's really tenseful.             Though I know so well, no matter how much I whine about them, I would still have to go through all those things. Have been thinking that wasting my time crying and...

           The bits and pieces came back bit by bit. I lost my sense of rationality for two days now. Why oh why, it had to come back after years I tried not to think about it. That moment it showed itself, I felt my breathing stopped and blood rushing through my veins simultaneously. I'm trying very hard to make sure I keep my sanity with me. Have you had the feeling of wanting and denying at the same time? If I'm allowed to state this as the worst feeling a homosapien could feel, I would ban any aspects that could let this happen.            I'm gonna keep this short, cause it's obviously not going to be sweet. For now, I'm just gonna stick with my desire to stare and stalk 24/7 although it is definitely wrong. Though I hope, dated 23rd July 2010, I would slash, and scratch and rip off even the tiniest bit that relates to it. Please, say goodbye.

            Amigas; plural for friends in Spanish. I have this one obsession about Spanish language. Never had any chance learning them yet since the head principle of Logan Park High School didn't let me take the class when I was in Year 10. She thought it would be hard for me because English is already my second language as she thought that Malaysia don't teach English as a compulsory subject in schools. Well too bad for me.             As I was saying, friends; this particular topic always attract me in any aspect at all. It's just an ingredient of life that I could never figured out of. The moment I started having memories of friends, always change the theories of what friends are, really. I used to think friends need to see each other everyday, play and talk all day. I used to think that every person you play with and talk with is your friend. I thought that having more friends are better th...

           Not that I truly believe in this kind of crap. It's just after all these years, I have put number 7 as my favourite number. Sometimes I even call it as my lucky number 7 . It's so attractive, I love it when every time I chose, picked or got a 7 . And as my life as boring as it is now, going through all those personality shits in Facebook, I found this. Unsurprisingly, I was astonished to find this :) Love ya 7 ! Can I find a cellphone number that consist only 7's?  

              It's not very pleasing, honestly. For most people, love would probably be so wonderful, they couldn't even see anything better in their life. Too bad I must say, it's the other way around for me. Not that I hate it. It's just what happens when you keep falling for the same person over and over again. Tiring it is, rather annoying too. It's neither because he's being an ass nor I can't find anyone else. The bouncing as if  I was on a trampoline that I can't stand.                             I mean, getting over the years, I kept on putting myself in the same position over and over again. You know, falling and getting back up again without no hands given to me.              I loved him, got over him, fall in love again, got mad and moved on. And yes, falling in love again and it seems like I have to try to get ove...

Oh wait, still trying. I'm trying hard, to get back on track where I was running on before. I mean, the writing, the reading and the photography things have stopped for quite a while. My mind got blew off from all those similar ideas of spending my time with beneficial hobbies since two months ago. I have no idea why though, I wouldn't say it's just boredom all the way, it's simply cause my time has been spent to other else. I was working for a while, which was not worth it since the pay is none bigger than a particle, while the work were so much, I think I was already working for 2 years! The environment was depressing, lots of international workers that it made me felt like I was the one who travelled to another country for a job. But it was truly an experience, I gained some, I lost some too. Since I never learnt that I'm bad at financial discipline. I only realised that I could not handle cashes on my own after RM 300 too late. Oh well, let by gone be by gone.  ...