Idiosyncrasy

            At the age of age of 18, I'm feeling lifeless and bored. Chasing what they call 'fun' and 'success' in life. I'm the one who walks around wondering what to do next, not really the next 5 minutes, but the next 5 years. I'm the one who wonders around walking by myself, trying to figure out my own instincts. I want to chase my dreams, but it seems to run far away from me. I could not even see the sight of my-so-called ambition anymore. It all seem to fade away. I don't even know if it's even possible to achieve my dreams.             Despite all these whining, I'm gonna have to stay on the positive side of the track of life. I would not want to add grief to my depression. I could actually see a stick figure coming towards me with a yellow Sharpie, drawing a grin on my face with my teeth showing as the way I like it. I'm surely gonna walk around doing my daily duties with more confidence and most likely more...

                 But it hurts, deeply, almost throughly, across, vertically not to mention horizontally through my heart. I'm too filled with emotions, having no much more than a particle thick of rationality. Sure, a smile or should I say a grin surfaced after you said you did recognised me. We were kiddos, but our reminiscence still remains as if it was only yesterday. Would you even know how much our friendship meant to me?                  Although it's not all rainbows when you're back in my scope of vision. It has been too long since we last talked to each other, or ride bicycles with one another. It has been too long when we fought about who's wrong and who's right. Too long. I still have some sense of rationality, when I know you wouldn't remember these moments. Cause it wasn't as special to you as it was to me.               ...