Idiosyncrasy

Hey you, the breeze came and told me about you, the sun then showed up and said that too. They whispered in my ear, saying you are the one. But then the black clouds came. Rushing towards me, screaming at my face.. that you would not be mine... Hey you, You're so far away, I don't know what to do. You're so ahead away while I'm still counting steps behind you. We're so different. Why do I still desire you? Hey you, I'm sorry that I stole off the pictures of you. I'm sorry that I stare them all night long. I'm sorry that I dreamt of you for so long. I'm sorry that I crave so much, for you. I mesmerize your name, though you did not know mine I remember your birthday, though you did not care for mine I'll be here, looking at you from afar, Cause there's no guts in me to talk to you and cross the bar.. I'll just be your hidden lover, cause you worth a thousand better

Aku bukanlah seorang anak Malaysia yang boleh dikatakan seorang yang mempunyai semangat patriotik. Tapi, berada di Dataran Merdeka sehingga 3-4 pagi bukanlah juga tanda kau menyintai Malaysia sepenuh jiwa. Tolong jangan silap tafsir ya? Aku pernah mencaci, pernah juga membenci, benci dengan sikap kerajaan kita yang lemah, menyampah dengan sampah-sampah yang bersepah. Aku meluat dengan sikap manusia Malaysia yang membuatkan negara kita tersenarai sebagai negara ke-empat yang kurang prihatin dgn kepentingan orang lain. Betul, aku belum penat menyatakan kebodohan Malaysia yang masih dipengaruhi anasir-anasir luar. Mungkin tidak cukup dua muka surat kalau aku nyatakan semua. Tapi, bila aku dengar lagu ini terngiang-ngiang di pendengaran, entah mengapa sayu hati. Mula terbit rasa cintakan Malaysia. Pernah dengar lagu ini?

Sana sini bawak SLR. Haiihh, aku ada jugak teringin, tapi satu habitat (tabiat + habit) tabii dalam norma kehidupan aku..susah aku nak suka apa yang semua orang suka nih. Aku pun tak faham isu berkenaan apa masalah nih timbul. Tapi timbul juga perasaan ingin tuh. Lagi best kalau boleh tangkap gambar seindah ini.

Sebab aku dah jumpa my long lost friend gara-gara chilanat mana yang curi N73 aku! Tengah nangis sekarang nih sbb dah lama tak tengok diorang..

Mama dah balik! Yeay, tapi sedih sebab lepas nih dah tak mungkin aku jejak bumi New Zealand tuh lagi :( Jikalau mungkin sekalipun, Otago Uni, wait for me! Mama mamai, terus melepaskan geram terhadap bantal di Hillside nih, lagipun masa di NZ ketika ini kami baru nak bermula solat Subuh, kira-kira jam 5 pagi. Aku pula, melihat bagasi-bagasi mama yang sarat tuh, tak sabar nak bukak. Mama kunci pintu, aku terjah beg biru. Kalau ada screen effect maybe time aku buka beg itu, ada sinaran cahaya yang keluar. Apa yang aku jumpa? Ini dia.. Inilah faedahnya bila kilang Cadbury berada 40 min dari kawasan rumah kami. Hehe, Whittaker's juga one of my favourite tapi mama tak beli the one that I love :( Most of the chocolates here are not in Malaysia, and this is only a third of it. Nguahahaha :) I miss NZ already. Then, aku dig in much deeper, deep sgt sampai terjumpa pulak lingeries. Aku kona sikit, aku jumpa si gemok nih Comel sangat kan? But its not for me. DAMN. Mama at her 50'...

I'm phenomenally thrilled, excited and in love! Seriously, the feeling is indescribable. I am so in love, I'm drooling all over him. I can't even move my eyes for a nano second from the beautifully drawn face. All the good things he brings in my life, I couldn't say enough thanks. For years that I waited for his existence in my life, after very long searches, countless locations, but then I came home full of frustrations. I was about to give up, and just no longer craving for his love in my lonely life. I never felt so gloomy in my 17 years of breathing. Then, in this bookstore, I saw them. Yes, so many of them. My eyes were very sore to look for the one that I have been desiring. I look through the eyes but it was an unfortunate that they were not any of them that I would call "the one". I looked down and walked away, Who knew, the days passed so slowly, and I walked to the same bookstore. I wasn't looking, not even seeking, for the one anymore. Ca...